The Body’s Own Spa: Emotional Regulation

By Rebeca Funes

In dim, candlelit rooms, hands knead your shoulders and back, and spas soothe your muscles and clear your mind. Just like a luxury spa, the body has its own system to calm itself and ease the mind. This system is known as emotional regulation, the ability to manage and modify our emotions to respond to emotional experiences in a healthy way.

Emotional regulation is commonly discussed in today’s society but less common in practice. However, its importance is understated. From improved mental health to clearer decision-making, emotional regulation plays a foundational role in one’s well-being. 

“People should really understand and practice calming certain emotions, just to think clearly about what they’re going to do and say. For instance, in an argument, they wouldn’t want the wrong thing coming out of their mouth,” said junior Laura Camille.

Within emotional regulation, there are two distinct categories–co-regulation and self-regulation. Self-regulation is the ability to independently manage your emotions, whilst co-regulation is the process of helping another manage theirs. Both are equally important, yet people learn self-regulation by experiencing repeated co-regulation with others, placing importance on teaching children how to self-regulate.

“Children need modeling, coaching, and supportive environments. Adults can show what healthy regulation looks like by naming emotions, calming themselves when overwhelmed or frustrated, and demonstrating that feelings are signals, not problems,” states Erin Brough, the associate director of communications at the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence in “Emotional Regulation is the Linchpin for Mental Health.”

There are many different ways to practice emotional regulation. One is deep breathing and mindfulness, as it helps calm the nervous system. Slow, deep breathing signals the vagus nerve, the longest nerve in the body responsible for various connections to the brain and internal organs, to trigger the parasympathetic nervous system, the part of your body that’s responsible for rest, digestion, and energy conservation. 

This activation helps slow your heart rate and reduce the body’s production of stress hormones like adrenaline. Not only that, but by paying mindful attention to breathing, the connection between the prefrontal cortex and the amygdala, a small section of the brain that controls emotions, becomes enhanced. The prefrontal cortex is the part of your brain that manages high-level thinking, emotions, and self-control. 

A study done in 2016 found that using this technique is not just effective in regulating aversive emotions but also in activating more areas in the brain, including the prefrontal cortex and the frontoparietal network (FPN). FPN is a major system of the brain that acts like the control center for managing attention and goal-driven behaviors. FPN is also involved in coordinating whole-brain activity. 

However, mindfulness and deep breathing are not the only emotional regulation tactics available. Cognitive reframing, the process of changing the emotional impact of a situation by altering the way you perceive it, and grounding techniques are other ways to regulate emotions. 

This restructuring is rooted in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), its foundation being the belief that negative thoughts can lead to negative emotions and that, by altering them, one’s emotional responses can change. Similar to mindfulness, cognitive reframing also helps regulate the amygdala and increases activity in the prefrontal cortex, allowing for more self-control.

“I think it is important for people to be emotionally calm in order to assess situations clearly, and depending on the situation, it could get them out of trouble,” commented sophomore Matthew Carabeo.

Grounding techniques are another strategy that helps shift a person’s focus from emotional distress to the present moment. By practicing different grounding techniques like the 5-4-3-2-1 method, heart rate slows, muscle tension related to anxiety relaxes, and it helps to feel in control again. The 5-4-3-2-1 method helps stabilize emotions by naming 5 things you see, 4 things you can touch, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you smell, and 1 thing you taste.

With emotional regulation, one’s overall well-being is improved. From better mental health by reducing feelings of anxiety to clearer decision-making by allowing people to evaluate their emotions and resolve conflicts calmly, emotional regulation is a core part of life. You don’t have to wait for a crisis to use your body’s spa; reap the benefits and notice how much your body and mind will thank you.