The Effect Strict Parents Can Have on Students
Many high school students have experienced wanting to go to an event with their friends just for their parents to say no. The reason may be due to safety concerns. Most of the time we feel like they’re doing it just because they can. Although strict parenting can encourage discipline and academic success, it can also negatively impact a student’s mental health, independence, and social development.
An article published by ScienceDirect states that an authoritarian style of parenting can lead to higher academic performance and more obedient behavior in students. By setting rules and expectations, students may learn how to be disciplined when it comes to studying and schoolwork while also having a higher sense of responsibility.
Even though this may be true, the negative impacts far outweigh the positive ones. Students who are pressured to meet high expectations from their parents can develop a fear of failure. This can make them feel like bringing home anything less than an A somehow makes them a bad student or child. This can cause extreme panic and stress for upcoming exams because they fear their parents would be disappointed in them leading to extreme cases of depression.
“In more recent years my mom has been constantly checking my grade book and constantly pressuring me to improve my grades and while I understand that it was just because she wanted me to succeed that pressure and stress lead to me developing anxiety and paranoia.” says sophomore Kevin Ceballos.
A lack of independence is also a concern when it comes to strict parenting. A parent that controls every aspect of a student’s life, like the content they see, clothes they wear, and friends they have, risks them becoming overly reliant or dependent on an authority figure. This can cause them to not be able to do or think on their own.
“Strict parenting has affected me by closing me out to one mindset. Being raised by my mother, she taught me that nobody is right but her. My parents would tell me that only they are right or only this idea or ideal is correct. I learned that there’s things in life only you can teach yourself and you have to live your life no matter what somebody else says,” said sophomore Zeric Taylor.
This can further harm a student when it comes to college and adult life. Imagine that you get into a situation in college where you need to find a solution but because your parents did everything for you, you’re unprepared and can’t think critically for yourself.
A student’s social life is also at jeopardy when parents are strict. When parents limit a student’s ability to hang out with friends or participate in social events, it creates a strong feeling of isolation. It can make them feel like they’re missing out and then when the topic comes up later, they feel excluded.
“My mom has been strict to me in the past by not letting me go to a certain event with my friends. At first, I was upset since I would be missing out on a fun time, but then I realized that my parents had good intentions behind not letting me go. She thought that it was too dangerous for me to go alone and the parents didn’t have her full trust yet. It made me realize that even though it may be difficult, they still love me at the end of the day,” sophomore Kelcey Etheridge shares.
This shows that balance is needed when it comes to raising a child. One that combines a set of reasonable rules and regulations to keep you focused, but one that still leaves you room to grow on your own, to make your own mistakes and choices, and for you to live your life.
